I took this photo as a joke two weeks ago today. Spur of the moment, we decided to spend a 4-day weekend on Minnesota’s North Shore again. First thing after unloading, I walked down to the fish shack’s porch on Lake Superior to enjoy the waves and sun (even though it was only 35 degrees).

I thought about sending the photo in a text saying “I saved you a seat” to two friends who would know exactly where I was – because they’d been there too. And yes, maybe to rub it in a little where I was. Not proud but there it is.

But if I texted them, they’d text me back. And then I would have to text THEM back…etc, etc…and I really just wanted to shut off the phone for the weekend.

So, I didn’t send the photo. But I thought about it again last week, after another friend texted me, “Can I come over?” and then “Wanna sit outside?” Now it was a gorgeous 80-degree afternoon so it made sense to sit outside…but I sensed it was more to share some bad news privately.

And bad news it was. I hugged her, and we sat on my front porch and cried.

Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.

Mary Oliver, “Wild Geese“

I have experienced friends going above and beyond for us in the last several years of open-heart surgeries and stroke. Several friends even offered me more assistance recently when they learned I was having shoulder surgery, to one of whom I rudely replied, “No! I don’t need help. I’m tired of asking for help!” (Sorry, Hol)

But I immediately wanted to know how I could help my friend when she shared her news. Because we’re friends. Because she’s helped me in countless ways for years.

Because humans are wired to support each other and, at some point in our lives, we’re all going to need help from someone else. It’s not a weakness. It’s a beautiful gift we get to give each other.

Sometimes we sit on the porch in peace, enjoying the sun & waves (even if it is only 35 degrees). Sometimes we sit on the porch in gorgeous 80-degree weather, crumpled together in a crying mess at the pain and unfairness of this life.

Either way, I’ve saved you a seat.

A friend loves at all times…

Proverbs 17:17